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Resources Centre / Twins Tips Introduction / Twins Tips / New Year Resolutions for Multiple Mums & Dads!
New Year Resolutions for Multiple Mums & Dads!
Its a new year for all parents of twins, triplets or more and an exciting time for anyone pregnant with twins or multiples. Time for new beginnings, new attitudes and if your twins are under the age of 7 as in my house - new behaviours! Never mind the annual resolutions to eat healthy, lose a few pounds or clean more frequently. Let's be honest, we make them every year and every year we barely stick with them past January 6th! This year, let"s make a few realistic resolutions that will ensure a more stress-free lifestyle.

Out With the Old. In With the New!

It"s time for a cleansing. Don"t worry; I am not referring to your house - yet. I"m asking you to cleanse your frazzled mind. Leave all the frustrations. challenges and tantrums that you've had with your twins or triplets of the past year behind.

Said Norman Cousins. an author. poet and writer. "Life is an adventure in forgiveness." Take a minute (or an hour. if necessary) to forgive your children for the things they damaged or destroyed last year. Forgive your husband for not realising or acknowledging with enough frequency how much you accomplish each day. Forgive yourself for reacting less than calmly in your more frustrating moments. Wipe the slate clean. Remember that this year. your children will likely lose their interest in the breakables of yesteryear. Your husband has another 365 days to work toward the moment when you can no longer ask in desperation. "Darling. when are you going to get it?"

And by all means. hit the shops this weekend and buy one great skirt - the sales this time of year are reason enough!

Ensure You Have a New Calendar

We mums are nothing without our calendars. I believe if I had to choose between a mobile phone and a calendar. I might surprise even myself and pick the calendar. Instead of buying a simple. bland calendar that only reminds you of how busy your life has become. find a humorous one that will guarantee you start each day with a laugh but still with plenty of space!

I also like to keep a desk calendar at work which provides a humorous quote or thought that keeps me smiling all day long (and sometimes longer). If you're pregnant, why not invest in Twins UK's new Week by Week Pregnancy Calendar - it's a 40 week calendar so you're not likely to get to the end but as it's perpectual, it starts when you start!

Plan Your Weekly Escape

For heaven"s sake. this does not include a trip to Tesco for nappies or the supermarket for the weekly shop! Plan to have a scheduled afternoon or evening each week when you do something for yourself. Sign up for a yoga class or something more creative. join a local volunteer group or just meet your friends for coffee! Choose something that you will enjoy. that will make you feel satisfied and that you will look forward to each week. If you are emotionally invested in the activity. you will be more committed long term but whatever you choose to do. make sure you do it - we all need some 'me time' so no guilty feelings!

Keep Cabin Fever to a Minimum

If you have twins. triplets or more children who are not yet regularly attending school. vow to have an activity at least once a week that gets you all out of the house - especially if you live in a cold winter climate. How about a weekly trip to the library to pick out a few new books or movies? Or a weekly play group to meet with friends? Active classes like Tumble Tots will drain a bit of the kids" energy or music & song classes for young children are fun and interactive ? Winter can seem endless. but if you have a plan to make it through a week at a time. you"ll be swinging on the swings at the park and having fun on the beach before you know it.

Eliminate One Source of Stress in Your Life

Acknowledge one thing that stressed you out the most and plan to eliminate it this year. What one item or activity distressed you the most in the previous year? Was it your lack of control over household finances? The infrequency with which you and your husband got out together? The constant clutter in your home?

Once identified. find a way to ensure that that "thing" doesn"t bug you through the new year as well. Hire a cleaner every other week or once a month. Sit down and obtain a more accurate picture of your finances and monthly budget as well as a plan to ensure you"re sticking with that budget. Find a babysitter you can rely on to come once or twice a month or do a deal with friends who have multiples to babysit for each other once a month.

Choose One Book to Finish by the End of the Year

How many books are sitting by your bedside table? If you"re like me. about six; however. they likely include the following: a guide to managing multiples. a strategy for keeping your marriage functional in the face of raising multiples. a self-help book on dealing with stress, a Bible (I pray for guidance regularly!), a book about inspirational women entrepreneurs and the Good Housekeeping guide to getting gum. crayon and dried up, previously spit-out raisins off the carpet ! Is there even book sitting in that stack that is purely enjoyable? I"ll admit. I do have one: a murder mystery by Agatha Christie. However. I"m only on page eight and I started it six months ago and I"m determined not to jump to the back to find out whodunnit!

Choose a book that you"ve wanted to read for some time and vow to complete it within the next six months to a year. We should all complete at least one book each year that is read for pure enjoyment.

Get Organised !

A cluttered home creates a cluttered brain. Multiples" Mums can"t afford any more clutter than already exists. Organise drawers that are currently overstuffed with colouring books. take-out menus and various sign-up sheets. Sort and arrange the items in your cupboards. Sort out your kitchen cupboards. Get rid of all the toys the children no longer play with and donate them to a charity shop. This need not be an all-day affair. Dedicate yourself to a location-a-day plan if need be. You"ll be amazed by how much more relaxing it is to open a well-organized cupboard than one filled with contents from which you have to cower when opening.

Make Your Personal Yearly Medical Appointments - This Week!

It"s easy to procrastinate when making non-critical medical appointments. After all. who has time to sit on hold for long periods of time. waiting to find out how many months will pass before she can be seen? As we listen to classic "on hold" music while the minutes tick. we convince ourselves that we feel just fine and will. therefore. make the appointment another day. Before we know it. it"s June and the doctor or dentist can"t get us in until November!
Dedicate a week this month to making your annual appointments for a physical. well-woman exam. dental cleaning and any other annual appointments you require. Make the appointments for your husband as well. His health is just as important. yet he is likely to go 10 years without seeing a doctor if allowed. You may even be able to get a family appointment which will save you time and hassle.

Begin Reading One Personal Guide

I realise Im asking you to add yet another book to the ready-to-topple-over stack presently next to your bed. Yet. if there is one tool that has helped me and many of my friends shuffle through our days with a little less frustration over the small. albeit annoying occurrences of each day. it is their spirituality or just plain down-to-earth common sense.

Invest in a book that gives you the strength and the perspective to conquer the numerous inconveniences - not to mention routine daily activities - that transpire. Seek simple strategies for living a more fulfilled and peaceful life and learn to be calm and stress-free. There are many good books that help you recognise and develop these traits but I like "Don"t Sweat the Small Stuff.and it"s all Small Stuff ! By Richard Carlson as it"s thought provoking and humorous.

And Finally. Give Yourself a Pat on the Back !

All multiples mums (and dads) are amazing ! How many times have people said to you 'I don't know how you do it ?' Hundreds. thousands ?? Take time out just to realise what an incredible person you are and give yourself a big pat on the back.
New Year"s Resolutions are your own. They are meant to enhance your life. not add to the chaos that already exists within it. If you commit to shifting the practices in your life that cause you to count the minutes until bedtime from the minute you open your eyes each morning. you will surely be on your way toward a fulfilling new year.

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